Jason Momoa
by Cybele Malinowski | American Way
“I am trying to see things in perspective. My dog wants a bite of my peanut butter chocolate chip bagel. I know she cannot have this, because chocolate makes dogs very sick. My dog does not understand this. She pouts and wraps herself around my leg like a scarf and purrs and tries to convince me to give her just a tiny bit. When I do not give in, she eventually gives up and lays in the corner, under the piano, drooping and sad. I hope the universe has my best interest in mind like I have my dog’s. When I want something with my whole being, and the universe withholds it from me, I hope the universe thinks to herself: “Silly girl. She thinks this is what she wants, but she does not understand how it will hurt.”— THEORIES ABOUT THE UNIVERSE by Blythe Baird (via blythebrooklyn)
im crying
a friend of mine forgot the word “lamp” once and said “light faucet”
I’m shaking from laughter. Yes, this is the right way to start a Friday morning.
I forgot the word fork. I was trying to find the world and explained it as ‘ like a pitchfork’ then immediately realized my mistake
some old timey greek chick: i hate men, i wish i could just be with a woman instead
sappho, about to invent lesbianism: Oh, You Haven’t Heard?





